Thursday, May 24, 2007

When You Realize Your Child Isn't Like Everyone Else

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My son C. has special needs. That's a simple sentence. But that sentence is probably one of the heaviest statement a parent can say.

This isn't a "woe is me" type of post. This is a post that is meant to try to illustrate the complex flurry of emotions a parent goes through during the initial realization that your child is going to be "different."

My wife found out that our son C. had hydrocephalus during an ultrasound. We were completely thrown for a loop. We had already done an amniocentesis, by my urging of my wife, with no indications of any "issues." I actually didn't attend the ultrasound because I figured we'd been given a clean bill of health. My wife called me with the news. Your mind immediately starts spinning. Wonderful and terrible thoughts immediately claim stake to your brain and begin a vicious war. Panic typically wins for a while. Anything said usually is something you regret. I know I said some things to my wife, which she's forgiven me for, but I will continually apologize to her.

My son is now 4 going on 5. He's made miraculous progress and I'm so glad we have him in our lives. People still look at him when he walks with his little kid walker, but his smile and awesome attitude usually disarms anyone's preconceived notions.

Last night we had an acquaintance at church relay to us that one of their children has some special needs. I saw in this lady's face the questioning look and could almost hear the thoughts fighting inside her head.

The good news is that God means all things for good for those that believe in him. Relying on that will help eventhough it's so easy to forget that promise in the midst of such a personal storm.

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